"Open your eyes" & stuff ....

 

Hello everyone! 

I realize it has been a while since my last post. Work has been so crazy I barely have time to scroll through any social media unless someone specifically sends me something and I have also been trying to work more on ME but exercising more and all that jazz. 

I have done a few sketches in the meantime though: 

 

But the truth is, I have been kind of in a creative funk. I sit down to create and I just feel like I can’t some days. Those days are extremely hard for me and make me sad. I think it is mostly stress from everyday life like work, grown up things , etc.  However, then I have days where I cannot concentrate on anything else. I just have all these ideas flying at me and I end up spending an entire day writing ideas down on sticky notes. I love that though. Those days are ONLY brought on by Lee DeWyze music and when I am in a lull… I crave it. Does that make me an addict? If you could FEEL the way I do at times like this.. you’d be too. 

So I sit here, nervously tapping my foot and anxiously awaiting new music from Lee to get lost in. I am so excited. 

Hopefully this funk will end, as I have a show coming up soon. 

 

I had this idea the other day that I was pretty excited about. After my last sketch ; I noticed that I only have about 20-25 more pages left in this book. After those are filled, I will have filled 3 entire sketchbooks with about 200 pages per book. That is A LOT of inspiration. SO I was thinking…. I create images inspired by Lee DeWyze music and lyrics that touch me and I try my best over and over again to explain to you how special they are to me. haha, all joking aside…. I am a pretty complex person. There are LOTS of things you do not know about me, the things that brought me to be the person I have become or why certain things me so much to me. 

Now, granted I will always have parts of me that will always be locked instead. I found the perfect quote to explain why that is:  “I’m very picky with whom I give my energy to. I prefer to reserve my time, intensity and spirit exclusively to those who reflect sincerity”- Dau Voire. …. And even then I’m guarded, Always have been. 

 

Anyway, despite that; I have decided to make my next sketchbook a true Art journal. I am pretty excited about it and a little nervous at the same time. I plan to start out with a self-portrait and my artist’s statement. After that each page is going to give you a little bit of me and an image that reminds me of it. Family life, things that always made me feel safe, biggest fears, favorite things, quotes, etc.  

 

I have a feeling by sharing that stuff, you’ll be able to relate to my work more and understand why those particular lyrics touched me, or understand why I love horror so much or anything creepy. Obviously there will still be hundreds of Lee inspired drawings because they are such a huge part of me. You’ll maybe understand why I’d choose Lee’s song “Open your eyes” as the theme song of my life.

If you were watching a movie about my life, “Open your eyes” would definitely be softly playing in the background to enhance the dramatic narrative and the emotional impact of most of the scenes. (I told you I was complicated): 

“Open your eyes
You’ve gotta see the truth to see the lies…” , “You’ve gotta feel the lows to feel the high”, “What’s coming over me? I can barely breathe. Everyone can see. Everyone but me” , “Open you heart
Put together, what you tore apart?”

 

See? Deep and so fitting. The most important line though? “Remember where I end and where you start…”That’s always been important to me because like everyone else, when you get into relationships both romantic and friendships…. People lose a little bit of themselves and blur that line. I’ve been guilty of that several times. I have been finding “Me” again in my art and Lee’s music and let me tell you something: I love my life. I have an amazing husband that loves me, and amazing son and friends that have seen me through everything… but I missed “me”. 

The other day when I thought of this new sketchbook theme, I was telling mare about it and her response pretty much made my heart burst, like her words usually do: “Understanding a person’s art, whatever medium that is, is understanding them. Knowing their heart. When you find the heart in something, you find inspiration, you find connection, and even pieces of yourself... “  I LOVE that. It is so true.  What would your theme song be? Are you able to recognize choices you’ve made when you were not being yourself? What would YOUR biography look like if it was sketched out? I am extremely excited to see mine. 

 

-Jenn